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07 Apr
2017
It Takes One To Know One.
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A Tribute to Arjun Bhardwaj – Tutorial on How to NOT commit suicide.

I came to know about Arjun Bhardwaj through Facebook. A viral video that popped up on my Newsfeed with a thumbnail of a guy my age.

Everything seemed normal except that the title read – Tutorial on how to commit suicide. It felt clickbait-ish so I did what everyone does – Clicked on it.

The one minute and forty-three seconds that followed was unimaginable. Now I honestly didn’t believe that he meant it when he said ‘See you on the other side’ so I Googled him almost immediately.

It was true.

The headline read – A Student Of Narsee Monjee Kills Himself By Jumping From His Hotel Room.

Soon after it started trending on Facebook.

It was heart-breaking, difficult to believe, and utterly painful.

If you’re anything like me – you wanted to find out more about him. And I went all in. I had (read needed) to know more about him.

I checked the usual – Social media, Google, community forums, interviews and the likes.

Here is what I found out – In an excerpt from First Post, Harinarayan Bhardwaj, Arjun’s father had said that his son was ‘disturbed and depressed’. He spoke to him ten minutes become he finally started the video.

I looked long and hard to find out his Facebook profile to no avail. Later, I read somewhere that authorities had asked Facebook to take his homepage down.

The primary reason for that was the backlash. If you don’t know this already poor Arjun Bhardwaj couldn’t get any respite even after his death. His social media was flooded with hate posts.

People ripped on him left and right. Things like telling his mother – “Kash us din muh me le leti” is painful is say the least.

Just try and comprehend what must be going through his parents.

If you can’t be nice to people when they’re alive at least try and be respectful towards the dead and those close to them!

Now, let’s get one thing clear – I do not support suicide.

Suicide is an ultimate act of desperation and I truly understand how you might be at a point where everywhere you look you see pain and misery.

And I would urge you to understand that too – The amount of pain he must have been in to have to resort to such an act.

Scoopwhoop says that he was incredibly lonely, a recovering addict and his social media reflected that he was trying to reach out to people who would just maybe once sit up and take notice of how much pain he was in.

Before I begin my tribute to him I would like to include a conversation here. A friend of mine I live with said the following words – “I think people who commit suicide are stupid. Why? Because they couldn’t do shit with their lives.

If they would’ve done something with their lives they wouldn’t have to resort to this.”

I tell him – So everyone who commits suicide does so because they are stupid?

He says yes, they are. If they are doing good in life and still they choose suicide they are the stupidest of them all.

I am going to let you ponder on this for a while.

While you do, here is my tribute to Arjun Bhardwaj.

My friend, your tutorial tells me to do  the following if I want to commit suicide –

Step 1 - Write letters to people you care about. You wrote 7.

Step 2 - Get drunk.

Step 3 - Eat some pasta because you can.

Step 4 - Enjoy the view.

You actually went ahead and jumped ‘to the other side’ as Step 5.

My friend, I am going to tell you what you probably did not know. I am going to give you a tutorial on how to not have to resort to suicide.

Step 5Stop And Rethink

Don’t write letters to your loved ones. When you say ‘I blame no one for my actions’, you aren’t lessening the pain for those who care about you. You’re making it worse for them.

They are going to blame themselves. They are going to live with this for the rest of their lives. I know how much pain you might be going through right now but you do not know how much pain they will have to go through.

Please. Think about them.

Your final act of desperation will break them forever.

Step 6You Are Not Alone

I remember someone somewhere wrote that Arjun should have been reminded that people are going through worse all around the world and I found it oddly funny.

The reason was simple – Arjun Bhardwaj was about to end his life. He wouldn’t have cared.

So, my friend, here is something else. You are not alone and you don’t have to be. There are organizations, out there, every single minute of the week. They’re waiting to help you. Every day, they are waiting for you.

Why? Because they care my friend.

One such organization is Aasra. Try calling them. They can help you. If they didn’t care about you why would they be on call all day.

Please remember. You are not alone. Someone out there cares. Even if you think otherwise.

Step 7Talk. Share. Listen.

Talk to people, my friend. Everyone is going through things and everyone is trying their best to put up a fake smile.

Share what’s bothering you. Tell your friends. Reach out. Do not update a status and even if you do and not many people like it, it doesn’t mean they don’t care.

They are too busy dealing with their own shit. Go up to them and tell them.

Tell your parents. Tell anyone who remotely cares about you.

You’ll be surprised.

When you hit rock bottom the people you never thought could, would help you.

I know it’s not that simple. But the alternative is ending your life. It won’t harm you to try.

CALL TO ACTION

If you were as appalled and heartbroken as I was after hearing about Arjun or if you’ve actually seen the video – Just know that it’s okay.

We must recover from this. We must forgive Arjun. We must try to understand the incredible amount of pain his final act came from. And you must understand that it could happen to someone you care about.

We as a generation have to accept part of the responsibility. We need to be more empathetic. We need to be receptive.

We need to be less judgmental. And we need to be more kind.

Suicide is everyone's responsibility.

I want you to do this for me –

Next time you are on Facebook I want you to write something –

Hey I am *insert name* and you probably already know me. If you’re reading this, please know that you are not alone. Know that you’re extremely important to me or someone else out there. Know that if you kill yourself I am going to blame myself for the rest of my life because I knew you and yet I did not reach out to you in time.

If you need someone to talk to just remember – I am here for you. I am ready to listen. And I am willing to talk. All you need to do is reach out.

Next time you feel all alone remember you did not give me a chance.

*****

Farewell Arjun Bhardwaj. I will meet you on the other side.

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About the Author

Total Articles : 11
Aitijya Sarkar

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